Termites

Clifford had always wondered what the woman looked like. Now he was standing in front of her, on her doorstep, trying not to peer too closely into her face. It was not nearly as lumpy as he imagined it would be.

“How may I help you?” asked the woman. Her lips were pinched, coated with shiny dark red.

“Hi. My name is Clifford. My father is Doctor Schramm.”

The woman squeezed her mouth even tighter. “What about it?”

“I don’t know.”

“Why are you here?”

He shrugged.

“What is your father up to now? Is he out mutilating other poor, innocent victims?”

“He only had that one malpractice suit.”

“Well, well. Lucky me.”

“Mrs. Delaware? I came to tell you that I’m sorry.” He looked sheepishly down at his shoes.

“Why are you sorry? What did you do?”

“Nothing. I just felt bad, that’s all, when it happened. Two years ago. I was younger then, still living at home. With my mom, at least. Now I have an apartment and a job.”

“That’s nice.”

“Well…” Clifford fidgeted, clasping his hands in front of his faded denim trousers. “I was glad you won the lawsuit. I guess that’s kind of dumb to say, since he’s my dad, but anyway…” he shrugged again.

“Money isn’t going to bring my face back.”

“I know, but…” he looked up. “I pictured it lots worse, I mean, really lumpy. It’s not so bad…” he stopped. “I’m sorry.”

“All I wanted was to smooth out a few lines.”

“I know.”

“He used a collagen that wasn’t even tested yet.”

“I know. Well, I mean, it was, but it just didn’t work with your…”

“It wasn’t tested yet.”

“Yeah, you’re right. Okay. I know.”

“Now I have to go around with these hideous lumps all over my face for the rest of my life. They’re congealed.”

“I know.”

“And now I don’t even have enough confidence to go out and get a job. So I better have won that lawsuit. Don’t you think?”

“Yes, yes I do. Well, I just came by to say I’m sorry, I don’t know why, but I guess I did, so I guess I’ll go now.”

“No, wait.”

Mrs. Delaware held up a hand. It shimmered with diamonds and long nails painted the same color as her lips. “I’ve just made some lemonade. Do come have some with me. I would like to behave in a more mannerly fashion than I have so far. Please, do come in.”

Clifford nodded and stepped inside.

“Here,” directed Mrs. Delaware. “Over here.”

He sat where he was told, and she cinched a portable table over his knees and up tightly against his waist.

“I’ll go get the lemonade.”

When she returned from the kitchen nook, she was carrying a tray with two glasses. Under her silky arm, she squeezed a large black book. She sat down next to him on the couch.

“Would you like to see some pictures of me when I was still beautiful?”

Clifford reached for his lemonade. “Sure.”

“I’ll show you.” She opened the photo album. “Look at me here. See? Look at this.”

Clifford picked out a jubilant face from a crowd of simpering young women on the beach.

“Hmm hmm..”

“I was probably about your age then. I always got lots of compliments from the boys.”

‘Hmm…” he took a sip from his glass.

“Do you want to see how I looked just before your father ruined me?”

“Oh, now I don’t think its…”

“He ruined me. Do you want to see? I had a few lines, that’s all. See? I already looked good, I just wanted to look better.”

“I’m terribly sorry, Mrs. Delaware.”

She took a furious slurp of lemonade. The ice in her glass and the bangles on her forearm clinked.
“I need you to go to the store for me.”

“What?”

“I need you to go to the store. I’m out of sugar.”

“But who usually goes to the store? Don’t you?”

She looked stricken.

“Do you have delivery service?”

“Yes, I do. But I’m not too happy with their service lately.” She stood up. “I’ll get the list for you. I have some other things I need as well.” She clinked and jangled over to her kitchen nook. “Here it is.” She came back over to where he sat and handed him a piece of paper.

Numbly, he reached for it. “I kind of don’t have a lot of time this afternoon…”

“It won’t take long. What do you have to do?”

“Well, I’m supposed to, uh, help my apartment manager with termites.”

“You don’t have to go meet your girlfriend?”

“Uh, no.”

“Well that‘s nice.” She ushered Clifford toward the door. “Please don’t shop at GO-MART on the corner a few blocks away. I don’t like their produce. Just drive a few blocks more, to EDDIE’S, by the stop light.”

“Okay.”

“And thank you. You’re a very nice young man.”

“Okay.”

Minutes later, Clifford was cruising along an unfamiliar residential street with a shopping list in his hand. He tried to reason with himself.

This is the least I can do, I suppose, for that lady. Here, all that time she was a mystery woman with a veil over her face, even for the publicity shots.

Clifford’s parents were going through a divorce during that time. His father wanted out of the marriage.

“Mom,” Clifford would say. “It’s not like you’re a failure or something, just because he wants to be with someone else. Anyway;, you still have me, don’t you?”

He reminisced as he parked the car.

Well, okay, he decided. If I can’t make my mother’s life any brighter, at least I can do a little errand for the mystery woman. He smiled, scrunched the paper up in his hand, and crossed a street on his way to the store.

Anyway, it’s better than sitting around my apartment listening to termites in the walls all day.

When he returned to Mrs. Delaware’s house, his arms hugging a bag of groceries, he stepped up and kicked gently on the door.

She opened it. She had changed her clothes. She was wearing a festive, crimson gown which matched her fingernails and lips, and a blaze of baubles tumbled gleefully down her bodice. She seemed eager, like she was anticipating a party.

“Hi, Clifford. Come on in. I want to show you something. Just go ahead and set the groceries down on the counter.”

He did as he was told.

“Look here,” she gushed. “I’m making Chicken Cacciatore. I make the best there is. Want a taste?” She swept up a tiny spoon, dipped it into the pan of burbling matter, and lifted it up to his mouth.
A droplet settled on his upper lip.

“Well,” she sang. “What do you think?” Her face was flushed with delight.

He nodded. Then, he backed away.

“Well, I guess I should be going now.”

“What? I thought you said you would have dinner with me tonight.”

“Oh, no. No, that’s just a misunderstanding, I think. See, I have to help my landlord.”

Mrs. Delaware’s eyes narrowed.

Clifford went on. “See, remember when I said I had plans? Well, I’m really sorry you went to a lot of trouble if you were expecting me.”

She remained unmoving in the middle of the kitchen, seared.

Clifford sighed. “Okay, look.” He scratched the back of his head. “How about if I come to dinner later, say, in a few hours?”

She brightened. The lumps on her face seemed ghoulish and exaggerated under fluorescent lighting. Hope and longing sizzled in her dark, wide eyes.

“Well, okay,” Clifford agreed. “I guess since everything is sort of the way it is. I’ll just go now for a few hours and then come back.”

“Mrs. Delaware nodded. “That will be wonderful. And Clifford?” She reached into her purse and pulled out a twenty dollar bill. “Why not get us a little bit of bubbly? Same store as before. I don’t like the selection they have at the GO-MART. Will you do that for me, please?”

Coyly, she unfurled her hand and presented him with the bill. He was suddenly seized by a fog of heady musk and citrus.

“Sure.” He fumbled his fingers around the money and headed for her front door.

Once outside and back in his car, driving, he felt dizzy. Then, he felt a rush of giddy relief. He had escaped. He needed never go back there again. Every second he drove, he was putting space between this woman and himself. He was free. What was the reason he had gone to visit her in the first place? He breathed in the sweet, fresh air from his open car windows, grateful and triumphant.

It was two hours now, since he had returned to his apartment, and he was slouching in a recliner, listening to the chomping of termites in the wall. Hungry and agitated, they reminded him of the inside of Mrs. Delaware’s head. He imagined that they fluttered and hopped and jittered. They fumed. They raged. They were relentless.

He sighed. A glance at the clock told him that he had an hour left before she expected him. How could he disappoint a woman who had already been so betrayed by life? Why had he gone to visit her? Was he just being a voyeur, or had he really wanted to help her? Well, how did he know she would turn out to be such a nut? It wasn’t his fault, now was it?

Still, what if it were he who was the unhappy, lonely person in this situation. Wouldn’t he want someone to care about him enough to come to dinner? Wasn’t he just being arrogant, like his dad? Didn’t he at least owe her a little bit of kindness since it was his own family who created her endless pain?

He jammed an arm into one of his pockets and then recoiled. The paper bill was still curdling down in the bottom corner. He sighed again, picked up the phone, and dialed.

“Mom?”

“Cliffy? Is that you?”

“Yeah, Mom, I got a…”

“Why I don’t believe it,” his mother trilled. “I can’t believe you are calling me. I haven’t heard from you in ages, Cliffy. Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m okay. See, I went to go visit….”

“I thought you didn’t even love me any more. What happened to us, anyway? We used to be so close. You pulled away from me, you know that?”

“Naw, Mom, you pulled away from me. You were mad at me because Dad left.”

“How can you say such a thing? You didn’t have anything to do with dad leaving.”

“Well…” Clifford glanced over at the clock. “Well, I guess since you never wanted to talk to me or be happy over anything I did…”

“Honey, I was depressed. I couldn’t respond. I couldn’t feel anything good. All I could feel was bad. It wasn’t your fault. I was that way even before your father left. That’s probably why he left me. I got treatment though, and I take medication now. I’m just fine. Is that why you moved out?”

There was a silence on Clifford’s end, and then a slight snuffle.

“Cliffy ?”

“…Sorry Mom. I just didn’t think…”

“Oh, Cliffy. You always were such a sensitive child, taking the world on your shoulders.”

“I thought you didn’t like me.”

“Oh, I’m so glad you called. I’ve thought about you so much, but I thought you just didn’t want to hear from me! You know, how you boys get so independent at this age, and don’t want you mother calling you all the time. Do you have a girlfriend, yet?”

“No, I…Mom, I went to visit Mrs. Delaware today.”

“Who?”

“You know, the lady with the face. The one who sued Dad.”

“Oh, her. Cliffy I am so glad you have finally called me. How could you have thought I didn’t want to hear from you? When will I see you again?”

“Well anyway,” Clifford continued, “I went to visit her today and now I don’t know. I feel bad. She seems to…”

“Say, I know. Why don’t you come over for dinner tonight? Just you and me? We can talk about old times.”

“Well, I was gonna say, Mom, that she invited me to dinner tonight, and…”

“Who did?”

“Mrs. Delaware. That lady with the face!” He started to sound a bit stressed.

“Oh, forget that old bag.”

Clifford wheezed into the phone. Then he let go with weary laughter. It was all just too funny., Everything was. And so easy, too.

“Thank you, Mom.”

“Anything else I can help you with?”

“Yes. I’ve got a wall full of termites and they are driving me nuts. They are destroying the place.”

“So? You don’t own the building, do you?”

“No.”

“So? Let ‘em eat their greedy little hearts out. It’s not your problem.”

“You’re right. I don’t own it. I don’t even have to pay the exterminators.” He wheezed again.

“Come on over for dinner and you won’t have to listen to them.

“Okay. I’ll be there in about an hour.”

He could just mail the twenty dollar bill back to Mrs. Delaware in an envelope with no return address.
He put the phone on its hook, leaned back in the recliner, and smiled.